Structured
Co-Parenting Counseling
Structured
Co-Parenting Counseling is designed to help separated parents plan
and maintain a successful co-parenting relationship for the benefit
of their children.
After
a parental separation, the best predictors of child adjustment are the
quality of parenting in each home and the quality of the co-parenting
relationship. Regardless of the placement schedule, it is essential
for parents to have a cooperative relationship. When parents live
in two different homes, children adjust best if their parents learn
to work together in parenting.
Most
people entering the divorce process know little about what to expect,
what their choices are, and how to move the divorce process in a constructive
direction. Parents are pressured to be nice and cooperative
but are not given the tools to do so. The problems in the spousal
relationship spill over into the parenting relationship. Most
parents try the same strategies at co-parenting that failed in their
relationship with each other. As feelings of frustration and powerlessness
build, conflicts over placement and other parenting decisions escalate.
Parents end up bullying, manipulating and litigating rather than making
simple decisions. Structured Co-Parenting is a way for
parents to end these struggles and work together for their children.
In
the court system, parents are led to believe that parenting after separation
is a process of taking turns. You get to be a parent when you
have placement, and you are not a parent when the other parent has placement.
You get to do anything you want when you have the children, and you
have no control over what the other parent does during their time.
This goes against the basic instinct to be a parent all the time.
Most importantly, this approach of taking turns is not good for the
children.
Structured Co-Parenting
Counseling is not like other counseling. We do
not try to resolve old spousal issues. Our focus is on the future
of the parenting relationship. We offer a blueprint for successful
co-parenting, help parents reach parenting agreements, provide information
on what has worked for others, and establish rules to overcome past
problems. Structured Co-Parenting is time-limited, usually
two or three two-hour meetings. Parents will learn:
1.
How to separate past problems from the future parenting relationship.
2. How to make contracts for positive behavior so that the parenting relationship is civil,
trusting, mutually rewarding and successful.
3.
How to coordinate parenting in two homes.
4.
How to identify, express and resolve concerns about the parenting in
the home.
5.
How to successfully make decisions, solve problems and resolve scheduling
conflicts.
6. How to coordinate and plan the children’s care and lives outside the home including
childcare, school activities, social involvements and relationships with extended
family.
7.
How to keep the pressures of having parents in two homes to a minimum.
8. How to be included in all aspects of the children’s lives, share in the joys of raising
children, find out what is going on with the children, and create access to both parents
for the children, regardless of the placement schedule.
Costs are $75.00 per hour per
parent, due at time of service.
For an appointment, or more
information about this service, contact:
Mindy Haseleu, Psy.D.
(920) 261-4100, ext. 307
Donald Meyer, Ph.D.
(920) 261-4100, ext. 215